Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Perfection



There. I said it.

I feel like I say it all the time, so much so that I feel like you guys are like, OKAY! We get it already! But I still get messages and I still hear comments all the time about lack of confidence. Guys... side note: confidence is not me putting myself on the internet in my bathing suit. That is a "side effect" of confidence, if you will. Its a very thin line. Putting fat thighs out there for the world just takes someone willing to take the abuse. Confidence comes from being able to look at yourself after having the bad day the abuse causes and getting back on that self-love horse. That's probably the absolutely worst way I could have worded it, but I feel like we all know where I was going with that.

With the changing projection of what a woman is in this world, everyone is feeling the pain. As fat girls, or plus sized women, with the new acceptance has come hate. On the other side of that, suddenly we have people that are no longer afraid to speak out about their preferences and sometimes the thin women are the victims of their own kind of hate. For example, one of my friends is an area manager at a local breastaurant (you know, the kind that really capitalize on looks), and shes just always been thin. She was talking about how it isnt uncommon to be told that she needs to eat a sandwich or for someone to walk up and just tell her how skinny she is. She feels pressure to be something different even though 100 other women would look at her as perfection. The same goes for you.



Rhonda Rousey, the UFC champion has been challenged for her "masculine" appearance despite her success but has also spoken out against what she calls the "do nothin' bitches" or as they are more traditionally known, "trophy wives". I talked about it with the male this weekend and he laughed when I said those trophy wives probably put almost as much time into what they do as what Rhonda does. I then reminded him of every single thing a woman must be to be "perfect" in the eyes of society. I'll name a few so we fully get the idea: tanning, hair, makeup, hair removal in the places you aren't "supposed to have" hair, facials, working out, teeth whitening, skin evening, wrinkle removing, augmenting, filling, reductions, being polished every time you step out... it all takes time. Hell, it takes me an hour and a half to get out of the house in the morning and I wouldn't even consider myself close to that level. I found it funny how Rhonda was so outspoken about women that were striving for exactly what she was- perfection. Just in a different way.

Faturday Night Live did a blog post that hit on something I've touched on before. She said, "Skinny Women are NOT the enemy." No woman should be the enemy based on what they choose to do with their life. I was guilty of it myself- though I caught myself and started the retraining- when I saw a Facebook post about stay at home wives/moms and what they do all day. What it took for them to stay organized, what they do with their time etc etc. I got a little miffed. Everything they listed, everything they did seemed to be something I did on top of my full time job and my blogging hobby. Then I thought again, I couldn't tell you the last time I had a house that got vacuumed every other day. The male is lucky if I help him with dishes more than once a week. I also don't have kids. So while some women may do less, even though I wouldn't ever know that for sure, I may do less than a single mom in a day. It is simply a matter of circumstance. It doesn't diminish what I do get done. It doesn't diminish what you do get done in a day.

There is no right way to be a person. I think we can all agree that there is a wrong way to be a person (looking at you Donald Trump), but every example I can think of is about 30x worse than someone's occupation or looks. Even if your opinions are different, I feel like you can build someone up without putting another down. Imagine how much more we could get done in this world if we didnt have that tension holding us back. Imagine what the world would be like if we were always like the drunk girls in the bar bathrooms.
Everyone would be best friends, everyone would have compliments and curing starvation and bringing world peace wouldn't be so far fetched.

Just remember... There is no perfect body and there is no right way to be a woman. 



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