Look A Little Closer

Go ahead. Lean in and look a little closer! This was my outfit for day number two of hosting Dia Stylist Orientation. The guy in the elevator with me was impressed... so impressed that he insisted on lifting his shirt and showing me his new chest tattoo of a naked woman. Sir. 1.) that's inappropriate elevator etiquette- all clothes must stay on. That's right there with keep all hands and feet inside until the ride is over! and 2.) (and this is totally personal preference) The last thing I want to see on a shirtless man is a poorly drawn woman with a largely disproportionate set of breasts. It makes that weird smile you're giving me even creepier. I digress-

You know I love all black and you know I love lace. You know I love anything sheer and anything that makes you look twice. This outfit has it all. The top is a crop top you've seen before from Fashion to Figure. The skirt is a new one from the Christian Siriano collection for Lane Bryant.

(Top is a size 3; skirt is a size 24)

Red, White & Blog

If you can get over the fact this is a selfie and my laptop cord is making an appearance, this is a pretty great little outfit. Listen, nobody said blog life was easy... sometimes you're feeling a selfie as you run out the door for work. Why do I not have a professional photographer with me at all times!?

Every part of this outfit has a story I love so it makes me happy just wearing it. I think thats an important part of style and why I love it so much. Every piece creates a story that makes up who you are and who you get to present to the world.

The skirt (size 24): When I was in NYC recently, I stopped by Hey Gorgeous NY for a styling session. Veronica and I met Ashby there where she had racks pulled in our sizes with items she thought we would like. We had the best time! She picked out this skirt for me and I was instantly in love. It is a Modamix skirt and Modamix is probably my fav brand quality/style wise (Sorry Asos, they just have you beat by a bit on quality). Originally about $100, I picked this skirt up for about $40. They even shipped it to me for free because I didnt save room in my luggage for shopping- I wasnt thinking.. too busy over-packing.

Waisted

It's Saturday, boo! If you have a non-traditional work schedule and this means nothing to you, know that I worked all day today and hit magic hour for a few poses in this fit. 

This is me at the end of the day. Actually, I had to pull my hair out of a pony tail and put my heels back on to go out on the balcony. Most of the time I look more defeated with makeup smeared and hair shoved back and disheveled. Goes to show what an outfit can do for a girl. 

The whole top is from Asos. Long line vest and dip back top. My favorite thing to do is layer. I like to play with different textures and lengths. The grey top even peeks out the bottom of the back. It adds so much interest for a perfectly put together look. 

Best part about this outfit? It gives options. The grey top is super light and slouchy. Leave off the belt, vest and heels, opt for some sneaks and you have a casual but edgy run around look. (you may get a visual of that next)

Funny story, I live in a high rise as you can tell so I have to take Priss the dog down to potty in the mornings right after I wake up. I usually wipe any leftover mascara off my cheek (i know, I know) throw my hair back up and opt for the "I woke up like this" Beyonce look in case I run into a hottie in the elevator... There are plenty. I had this top on, tied up and to the side with my pj pants and definitely ran into a hottie, a lady with her dog and important business man number one. Little did I realize when I threw it on, it was extra slouch and my girls were on display (they looked good though, girl!)!! I faced the front and tried to discretely cover my cleavage but the whole elevator is mirrored sooooo.... It was too late. The party was already started at 7am! 

(Not So) Fat Shaming

I posted a quick little video of Amy Schumer's video on Facebook the other day where she shows the struggle of shopping as a fat woman. People lost their minds over this video. It comes after she was recently upset when she was regarded as a plus celebrity in a high profile magazine which also had some feathers ruffled in the plus community.

I'm actually on a different side of the fence on this one than a lot of the major plus bloggers- shocking that I disagree with someone, I know. Lets not forget what is important here- she is fat in her world. Sure, shes not my size 24 and I definitely have some struggles she doesn't (like not having a million dollars), but in a world of 2s and 4s shes experiencing what it is like to be a fat girl. 

We are going to have to accept the fact that plus size is the new money maker. The advertising and entertainment industry has figured out who has the money to spend and they are going to take full advantage of that. There will be non-plus or skinny plus women taking the "plus size checks" without wanting to be labeled plus size. We cannot downplay someone elses struggle because we dont like that. 

We cannot become the people that alienated us. As plus women we know what it is like to be shunned and treated as less than so why, when another woman is turned away by the straight size community would we not welcome her and treat her like we wished someone had for us? Is it because she said it is absurd she is considered plus size? It is absurd that only four sizes arent considered plus in the fashion industry. 

Is Amy Schumer as fat as I am? No. Is she fatter than some. Yes. That is how life works. Not one persons struggle is the same so please dont expect that she doesnt experience some of the same things you do. Her weight is constantly criticized up in a very public forum, Id say thats a part of being fat that Im glad I dont have to deal with. 

Instead of spending time debating if shes fat enough, why dont we start holding society accountable for what it has done to our collective body image? Amy Schumer is just a symptom of a much larger illness that has yet to be cured. 

Retro Fabulous

Before I get into the personal catch up portion of this post, let's get the good stuff out of the way! This. Mother Lovin' tunic!!

Asos consistently blows my mind. Like, quantum physics seems like an obtainable concept to grasp when I compare the two. The price point, the level of style and the quality are all exactly where I need them and I'm pretty hard to please from what I hear. Looking at you ex boyfriends.  If you're not on the boat, get on. You'll be happy. Just get on a smaller size boat than youd usually get on because they run big. (I'm not even mad about that) 

For casual days I am all for a great tunic and leggings. Seriously, if I don't have to wear real pants I just won't. The key to not looking like I don't like real pants is to balance them with something a little more chic. Heels and the belt really kicked the look up another notch. It took it from retro boho (the tunic is rather flowy and open in the front) to pulled together real quick.

Sizes:
Tunic: 24 at asos
Leggings: 3 at torrid

Now, on to the personal side...

Plus Prom Picks

Related: Where to Find Plus Size Formal Wear

Since I did a full on post last year for where to find prom wear (linked above), I decided to just do a few of my favorite picks this year. Oh my gatos. I'm so jealous of all the options now! When I went to prom there was NOTHING plus size to pick from. I capitalized that because I'm yelling in my head. I'm pretty sure I told you about my baked potato dress in my last years post. I tried to play it off as 20s/art deco inspired but I looked like someone re-used foil to wrap up a potato for baking. I did have one good dress my junior year- but I lost all credibility that last year.

Tips:
- check out Asos for cheaper options. They wont be quite as formal, but they will do the job for a significantly lower price.
- don't be afraid to look at bridesmaids dresses. You can definitely tell some dresses are meant for weddings but don't count one out just because it isnt marked for prom.
- please stay out of the formal shops inside malls if you want to keep your sanity. The mark ups are huge and the quality and selection is usually fairly low for plus girls. Not to mention the sales pressure is usually on full tilt there.
-start shopping now! The sooner you start looking, the less stress you have about getting it shipped in time. Online shipping is a breeze compared to the waiting time you have if you order at a boutique (you're looking at 6-10 weeks. Insane, right!?)

Tips for Outlet Shopping

I promise some outfit posts will be coming back, this blog/work/single life has got me like whoa lately. I have to give the former male props where they are due, having him around for outfit shots was quite helpful. Prissy (the poodle) tends to have a shaky paw... that and she is less than a foot tall and that's just not a good angle for me or my chin.

As you may have seen on my IG/Facebook last week (are you following me there, because you should be!) I used my rainy day off to go shopping at the outlets. Having a random week day off is actually pretty nice because shopping with no crowds? I'm there for it!! I put together a little list of do's and dont's for you so the next time you're searching for a steal you actually get one!

DO:
-try everything on. Same styles in the same size will fit differently. A lot of what goes to outlets is overstock, but they will throw in the items that have small design flaws like a size that fits too small or a slightly wonky cut or seam. I tried on four of the same pair of pants in the same size and only 2 fit.

-hit the sales. outlets often have to get rid of what they have before they get new stuff in so they will have big sales to clear out old inventory. You obviously have the holiday sales, but that is always when its the most packed. Make friends with the associates and ask if/when they usually try to "clean house".

-learn your discount store levels. There is a hierarchy, for example around me pricing is highest for in season items in the named store. Then there are the named store outlets. Then there are stores like TJ Maxx and Ross. THEN there are even further discounted stores like DD's discounts (which is the TJMaxx of TJMaxx). I'll rarely find big names in the super discount stores, but I'll find the same Chinese Laundry shoes I saw today at Rack Room Shoe Outlet for $40 for $6.

Dressing For Your Shape

I'm going to start this off with the disclaimer that I don't truly subscribe to dressing to flatter all the time. If it makes you feel great, I say wear it but I do understand that attitude doesnt work in all settings and some people simply arent there yet. This is one of my most requested posts, so here it is: Dressing For Your Shape.

If you Google "body types" You'll find dozens upon dozens of names for the same 5 shapes. Lollipop? Really? What does that even mean!? Big head and a stick for a body? Thats unfortunate. I went with the basics to make this easier for everyone.

If you want to use me as a comparison, I am somewhere between an hourglass and a pear. My waist is noticeably smaller than both my bust and hips, but my hips are larger than my bust when you add in the big booty.

The pictures here for you are from the sites of each blogger, click them to be directed to their sites. I promise you wont be disappointed!

Hourglass:
What is it: An hourglass is the bust and waist that are essentially the same measurement with a waist that is noticeably smaller. I read one time that the "ideal" ratio is a waist 8" less than both the bust and hips. (remember we are measuring around these body parts to get the numbers.) I think that number is a bit silly so I just go with "noticeable" as the determining factor.

Who has it:Boardroom Blonde
How to flatter it: Pick items that cinch in the middle. Natural waistlines, Pencil skirts,

Pear:
What is it: A pear is when you carry your weight towards your hips/thighs/butt.

Who has it: Chastity of GarnerStyle

How to flatter it: Create balance on top. Tops with detailed necklines to draw your eyes up. Try this years trend of ruffled necklines or a bold pattern top with a basic bottom.

Apple:
What is it: Apple bodies carry weight in their middle or waist- think round tummy or midsection.

Who has it: Amanda Allison

How to flatter it: Fit and flare skirts, high waistlines and tops with flow towards the bottom.








Rectangle:
What is it: Minimal noticeable curves, even measurements in bust, waist and hips.

Who has it: Nicolette Mason

How to flatter it: Work the shift dresses! Pick items with patterns or cuts that give the illusion of curves such as peplum tops or skirts.




Inverted Triangle:
What it is: An inverted triangle carries most of her weight up top. Very busty, smaller waist and hips.

Who has it; MonifC

How to flatter it: fitted tops, v-necklines and voluminous bottoms.

Catching Up to Myself: Sneak Peek

Heyyy boo, hey! So I've been a little MIA lately (lower post count than in the past, but not totally gone because you'll never be totally rid of me. Youre welcome) and I wanted to catch you up! I mentioned that I was going through some life changes lately- namely, everything. I lost my job in October, the male and I separated in November and now with the new work position I am having to move out of the place I've called home for the past six years.

Now, I'm not saying that wasnt all stressful, because I've spent the last few months trying to figure out who I was and often where my keys and phone were after many nights out, but I have to say, I am happy and excited for the fresh start. While I was trying to figure out who I was, I also got to spend extra time with friends that I'd lost touch with. I got a beautiful reminder of the strong woman that got me through all the other tough parts of my life (hint, thats me.) and I also realized that moving may get me closer to my family, whom I'd also neglected a little because I was always "just so busy."

I wont even lie to you, it has been hard trying to find the inspiration for multiple posts a week then putting the hours into graphics and links. You know why I'm not lying to you? I told you I'd always be very clear with the behind the scenes. Life isnt perfect, not yours- definitely not mine. I've been saving up some ideas so get ready for some good posts! There might be a sneak peek below.

Trendcoming: Harness It

I made a statement a few months back that harnesses would start hitting the mainstream fashion scene more often- and sure enough, I've seen them (and harness inspired bras) more often lately. Let me be clear, these have a bit of a kinky history- harnesses are used in the S&M and kink community. Someone thats into that lifestyle may give you a knowing wink if youre sporting a legit leather piece. If youre not ready for that kind of association then Id suggest going with a strappy bra that takes some inspiration over the actual harness.

I've seen Tess in them in her seriously sexy shoots and I've seen Taylor Swift wearing one similar to the light brown one over a regular top so you can make it as sexy or as toned down as you want- and thats why I love them. I mean, if T-Swift is wearing one, thats about as vanilla as you can get. You already know my love for mixing badass with sweet so I'd wear one like the top one under a low cut or sheer shirt for that hint of sexy in an otherwise fully covered look.

I've given some links for the looks above, youre going to find them mostly on Etsy because they are still pretty alternative. Leather Coven (2nd from the right) is one of my faves. Seriously, follow them on IG for some body love & diversity. They are custom made for any size and very reasonably priced. The top pentagram piece is probably my ultimate favorite, but they are the luxe option.

When youre taking something with such blatant ties to things a bit more taboo, its all in how you wear it.


Light Brown | Simple Black | Strappy Long-line | Strappy Black | Pentagram

To Flatter

 Lets talk about plus size outfits and flattery. I was out for brunch this weekend (and all around debauchery) so I wanted to be comfortable and in leggings for when I had 17 carafes of mimosas and chicken and waffles.

I picked up this outfit at Torrid this weekend. I didnt try on because I know how their sizing fits on my body, but I almost wish I would have. This tunic is definitely cute, but I may have wanted to try it on in a 4 and I'll tell you why. Do you see how the neckline cuts the girls almost in half? One size up may have fixed that and it may have given me a lower waistline- empire on me is not ideal since my smallest part is my natural waist and not right under the girls. A 4 also would have made the already too long sleeves even longer so I stuck with a 3 and have tried different ways of pulling the top together. Its a bit of an unflattering cut all around but the ease and comfort was worth it. I obviously cant wear this to work since I'm in a professional position, so for the weekends and running errands, it works perfectly fine.

2016 Trends

I really dont feel like I'm old enough for fashion trends to be cycling as fast as they are. What happened to my youth!? We are starting to pull from quite a few decades now, 70s are sticking around but we have started to add in some 90s and 00s and for that I'm trying to fight the urge to buy a fanny pack. Y'all- it would border on just me the sad, awkward tourist in a fanny pack instead of the cool teen wearing it ironically. "Please ma'am, the tourist buses pick up for the zoo over there- you're making our restaurant look bad." I can get on that plaid and lingerie inspired boat though!

70s:
I really hope that this decade stays around for a while in fashion. Fringe is just what I'm here for! Try a fringe tee with some shorts for the summer and a suede accent in the fall. Also- wide leg pants! Yessssss.

Fringe Benefits by casualtyofwear featuring flat pumps

Victorian:
My favorite styles to mix are sweet and edgy. Victorian vibes give me the chance to pair that pretty little ruffle blouse with a leather jacket or a sheer pussy bow top with those ultra distressed jeans.

The Victorian by casualtyofwear featuring a genuine leather purse

Read more for the complete list

Mad Moto

Now that winter is in full swing and the east coast is digging their way out of their homes after the blizzard, coats are starting their first round of sales. Just a little off the top- nothing major yet- but Spring is coming and you'll want a lighter coat soon enough so I put together a list of my favorite type of jacket. The moto.

I'd write a really metal love song for this style of jacket if I could! Its the perfect amount of sass for me. I prefer mine in neutrals- so blacks, browns and taupes but I included some more fun colors for Spring here for you. My favorite pairing for my black moto is with my long sleeve lace crop. It always feels magical when you walk into a room with your rough around the edges moto and then you take it off to reveal a whole lotta lace.

Read more for styling tips and links. 

Identity

When I started blogging I made a promise to you that I'd not just explore plus size fashion, but that Id touch on life and body positive topics to make this forum more dimensional. After all, we aren't the clothes we wear, they just tell others who we are so it only makes sense to talk about both.

So, who are you? I've been having this conversation a lot lately it seems. I'm sure it is presenting itself more now since I've been exploring my own identity so I figured I'd explore it with you too.

Someone asked me one time, "Who are you?" I almost had no idea how to answer, so I just started with what I had going on that week. I thought that telling about what I fill my time with would tell me a bit more about who I am. That wasn't a satisfactory answer, so I started about my past next. I rarely discuss that, especially with new people because its often just too heavy for the situation so I glossed over it and then thought to myself, Who the hell am I right now?

Lingerie List

Last year I did a pretty comprehensive list on Where to Find Plus Size Lingerie, this year- I'm just going to give you a cute little compilation. I'm also going to tell you that youre never too fat to feel sexy. If you worry about if your partner will think it is hot on, the answer is yes. The answer will always be yes. If they are having sex with you, chances are that they love your body already and they will really love it in lingerie. Ive said it before and I'll say it again, lingerie being sexy is much more about the woman in it than the lace its made of.

I mentioned last week that I'm a single lady this year (Beyonce anthem plays here) so I probably wont be putting on anything for anyone else, but I will have on a sexy bra and panty set just for me. Aint nothin' wrong with treating yo'self! If I was going to pick my after the after party outfit, it would be the strappy faux leather with the lace robe pairing because I like to be sweet but slightly unnerving.

Lingerie tips:
If you are blessed with a chest- underwire is key. If no underwire, look for a halter neckline. This is going to give those girls the lift they deserve!

If youre worried about your tummy- you dont have to be, but we all have our "thing". Try a babydoll with an empire waste so that it flows over nicely. You can also cinch it up with a nice corset.

If legs are something youre not ready to show- a nice pair of thigh highs and heels will do the trick. There are also full body stockings, but youre getting into a pretty serious lingerie scene with those.

Not ready for the right to bare arms? Most lingerie is sleeveless- again, you can try full body stocking, but thats a lot of work- so check into a satin or lace robe. I have a long black robe with sheer kimono sleeves that I call my "goddess robe". I put it on when Im getting ready and I instantly feel sexier.

If your bum is your concern- try a lace boyshort. You still get the coverage, but with a little peek-a-boo fun.

Links: Red & Black Lace | Red Sheer Lace | Purple and Black Chemise | Iridescent Corset | Strappy Faux Leather | White Lace | Short Black Lace Robe | Long Black Lace |

Trendy Under $20: Valentines Day

I've missed doing the Trendy Under Twenty posts, so here is one just in time for Valentines Day. I'm a single lady this year so since it is on a Sunday, I'm sure I'll be with another single friend yucking it up out on the town. Everything here, in case youre new to this, is under $20. Some items are under $10 (I'm looking at you adorable panties). I mean, who doesnt want a cute little heart on their booty?! These are not just the sales you want, these are the sales you deserve- and I'm here for you!

Red Crop | Draped Pencil Skirt | Black Flat | Rumba Panty | Heart Panty | Red Belt | Pink Belt | Black Off The Shoulder | Pink Turtleneck | Oxblood Skirt | Body Harness

Jumpsuit Casual

You know the days where going out in your pajamas sounds like the best plan but you've ripped a hole into your last pair of polka dot jammies and cant commit to showing the world your bum yet? This is a good alternative. It feels like pajamas but looks like you tried...and your bum is covered.

You've seen variations of some of these pieces over the last couple weeks- and this is the final. I'll tell you, this was my starter outfit for the day before I had to change three times and mix and match. It is easy, comfortable and still pretty fashion forward. Veronica snapped this picture real quick on the way back from lunch because I wanted you to see that you can wear a jumpsuit at a size 24/26. 

Seriously, if anyone tells you that you cant wear a jumpsuit, punch them in the throat and then steal theirs. I'm kidding- no violence. Just go buy one that fits how you like and wear it anyway. They will feel like they got punched in the throat and you wont go to jail. Everyone wins. 

Jumpsuit tips: 

-If you are largest in your butt/hips: find a wide opening top and a stretchy waist. Remember its going to have to get up past that middle before you can do anything good up top. 

- If you are largest up top, a good halter or V-neck can keep the girls wrangled and bring the eyes up.

- If youre tummy is largest: find a cut with a high waist and some give in the middle, maybe even with wide legs. Wide legs will carry the eyes down making you look taller and evening out the shape.

Sizing and brands after the jump.

Colourpop Review

***TEXT REVIEW BELOW VIDEO IF PREFERRED***

See Also: Review: Jeffree Star Liquid Lipsticks

I haven't done a makeup review post in a long while, so I thought I'd mix it up a little! We are still working on the editing skills over here too- so love my imperfections! You probably already know that I'm obsessed with Jeffree Star and his velour liquid lipsticks, like Buffalo Bill is obsessed with the skin suit obsessed. ...okay maybe not that obsessed, but I do like them a lot. I do know that while I may have picked up quite a few from the collection, not everyone is ready to drop $18 on a lipstick. I get it, so I found a more budget friendly option. 

Today I tried the Colourpop liquid lips and while I do like them, you can tell a difference that comes with the difference in price point, but getting 3 for the price I'd usually pay for 1 has its perks! Short answer: Would I buy again? Yes. Especially for bold colors I wouldnt wear often.

This first color is Guess. It is a deep blue toned purple.

The second color is Zipper. A vibrant purple.

The last color is Teeny Tiny. A brownish mauvey taupe. 

"Read More" for pictures. 

Glam Bam Thank You Ma'am

This is it! It has been one full year since I started blogging and I celebrated by wobbling along some train tracks in heels- which was much harder than I originally anticipated. Shout out to Veronica Bessey for the amazing pictures, and for keeping me on my feet instead of letting me go with my original idea of just rolling back down the hill in the mud. 

My very first post was about a MonifC crop top so I found it fitting that I celebrate my one year blogiversary with another MonifC piece. Remember the dress I drove to Houston for? Remember the dress I modeled for? Well, this is it in all its Beyonce-esque glory. I love literally every piece I own from MonifC. They make me feel like a goddess because each one is sexy and has a cool factor to it that I may or may not deserve. She is my ultimate fav in plus size designers and she was very kind to me when I toddled in front of her for a model experience I didnt know I was getting myself into. I'll be in NYC for CurvyCon this year and I have plans to hit up her shop and show my appreciation by spending money. 

Side tangent: it is incredibly important that you invest in pieces for yourself if there is a designer out there you love that may be a bit out of your price range. Starting a brand/boutique is incredibility difficult and often a pretty large financial burden so show your support as much and as often as you can by spending your money there (thats how the world works after all.) They cant pay their bills on hopes and dreams and next time you want to buy something, they may not be there.

I could write a song about this dress (and I promise that it wouldnt just be to work with Drake on the hook). The way it perfectly hangs while at rest, the way it catches the wind when you walk, It makes every entrance a diva entrance and that is something every girl should experience at least once. 

It is sold out now, her items tend to go fast so you have to really watch and jump when you find something you love. Occasionally she will bring something back- she did with my favorite crop top- so sometimes you can redeem yourself if you dont pick it up before it sells out. 

The quality of her items is always pretty good, and well worth the price tag. She generally doesn't have sales, so keep that in mind too. You are going to have to invest in a piece if its something you love. I've almost worn my little crop top out in the year that I've had it, so the cost per wear is pretty low at this point. (I think I paid $75 ish for it originally.) 

I picked the clutch up while I was at the MonifC event too- it is an Aldo bag though- which I didnt notice until later. Then it all made sense because I love that store. Quick tip: always check their clearance and the shoes run very narrow. I rarely buy shoes there since I have such wide feet, but the accessories are always worth a trip. 

The necklace was a gift from Veronica Bessey as well, and she said she thrifted it- the woman is a thrift genius.

Shoes are Lane Bryant- currently sold out. If you need a comfortable pair of heels though- LB is the way to go. They are generally set wide and they are solid heels. They always last the longest for me.

I'll just leave you with a few more pictures below.